Understand Stonewall to heal the SHAME

Judy Garland, pictured above, was uniquely beloved by gays in the 1960's. Her death was certainly a factor in the events that sparked the Stonewall Riots. As gays, if SHAME is part of your consciousness, it could help to understand what happened in New York City at that time.

This is my "history lesson" and it is valid from my point of view. I present it because I believe it helps us all to know about it.

In gay bars in the 1960’s, it was the typical custom of the local police to raid gay bars — to enter and ask all patrons for identification. This was done ostensibly to make sure there were no under-age drinkers, but the effect was to make life miserable for the patrons of gay bars. The police have been accused of systematically shaking down and extorting these patrons as much as they could.

When these raids occurred, usually, there would be a considerable number of vulnerable patrons in gay bars who were in conventional marriages or who held jobs where the revelation that they were gay might mean instant dismissal or disgrace. To avoid this divorce, dismissal or disgrace, these patrons would quickly pay outrageous fines that were assessed for such crimes as “disorderly conduct”. If the patron were not in jeopardy of losing his career or family, he might be able to hire an attorney and have the charges dismissed (since there was really no basis for the charge of “disorderly conduct” simply because a person happened to be a patron of a bar… even a GAY bar! But the most vulnerable patrons usually had the money to pay the fines and that became a source of revenue for many police departments around the country.

The bar personnel knew that these raids were capricious and unfair but there was nothing they could do about the practice until the historic event that took place on the last Sunday of June, 1969. On that fateful and historic day, Judy Garland died and large numbers of gay men who adored her headed for their favorite gay bar to find some solace with their fellows.


Judy Garland In Wizard of Oz


Judy Garland with Liza

That night, it wasn’t unusual when police officers conducted one of their routine raids at the Stonewall Inn on Christopher Street near Sheridan Square in New York City.

But what was unusual was that gay people were feeling a common bond at the bar and the raid was the spark that galvanized the Gay Community to come together. There were so many patrons in the bar that evening that the squadron of police officers was heavily outnumbered. As the police called for reinforcements, the gay patrons “called” for reinforcements, too. Since the Stonewall Inn was right in the heart of New York’s Greenwich Village, there was a tremendous population center of gay people within a few blocks. Thus, the patrons who realized that there was a riot beginning began to summon their friends and neighbors to descend on the bar in droves. Drag queens were comfortable in the company of the leather men and the students and lesbians along with stereotypes and non-stereotypes which simply didn’t matter on that occasion.


A rare photo of Stonewall Riots


We were all recognizing that we were a new-found family! Well, not ALL of us!*

By the time the police reinforcements arrived, they too, were overwhelmed by the growing crowd of angry gays and lesbians who had come to witness the activities and quickly became involved. The police had become trapped, barricaded inside the trashed Stonewall Inn and the victorious crowd of gays outside the bar began chanting the first choruses of Gay Power which were to become the battle-cries for future generations of gay people. The incident on that night continued with massive rallies for three days and the consciousness of Gay Power and Gay Pride became a part of the collective consciousness of gay people everywhere.

*Two paragraphs back, I have an asterisk hanging out there. And this is the time when I must confess that my own personal reaction to Stonewall in June, 1979, was NOT to embrace my fellow gays and lesbians! No, I saw the televised news accounts at my parents’ home in the conservative suburbs of St. Louis. Frankly, I was HORRIFIED to see the drag queens and other stereotypes being brought into our peaceful homes in the Midwest portrayed as rioters and unruly demonstrators.

In those days, I saw gay life as consisting of two types of people: flamboyant queens and schizophrenics! The latter was comprised of gay people who could “pass” for being conventional and who could hold down responsible jobs and blend into society without any discomfort (to others). Forget about the discomfort that I might feel to struggle to PRETEND that I am heterosexual, but my focus was on the discomfort that might be felt by OTHERS who might work with me or involve themselves in my life in one way or another.

This is where I can pinpoint a life of hiding and shame which I was living in the summer of 1969. Because I knew that I was gay, I realized that I had to keep my gayness a deep, dark secret to avoid losing society’s benefits (job security, promotions, marriage, children, social acceptance, etc.) which I felt were only bestowed upon the people who lived, dressed and behaved in conventional ways. This is the behavior pattern of a person who lives with shame and low self-esteem. My hand would be raised… I confess to knowing this pattern in my own life! The pattern was expressed in my life (particularly in the 1960’s and 1970’s) as treating every gay or lesbian person as if he or she were a second-class citizen — including myself! I often lied and mistreated my gay friends (who reflected back to me the most “shameful” part of my own character). There was no need for integrity as long as I catered to the non-gays as if they meant more to me than I meant to myself.

What was the consciousness before Stonewall? Considering the way those vulnerable bar patrons had previously paid extortion-fines to avoid being exposed in their lives, it is easy to see how the consciousness of Pride and self-esteem for gay people would gradually turn things around for urban gay and lesbian people in this country and throughout the western world. The lesson we have learned (and must continue to learn) is that as long as we have a critical mass of proud gay and lesbian people in our world, we cannot be denied our place in this world and our guarantees of equal protection under the laws. And further, with self-esteem, we can be worthy and honorable citizens of the world.

There are countless young people, today, who have no idea what the Stonewall Rebellion was and they can’t appreciate its significance. That is why we need to tell the younger generation about it and tell our parents and our extended families about it and stand up and say, “I’m GAY AND PROUD” (and say it LOUD)!

In addition, there are vulnerable gay people from other cultures, particularly in the Third World, where gayness has been regarded as an unacceptable state of being. These people are pressured to get married to opposite-sex partners or to face severe repercussions in their cultures. It is easy for me to recognize the shame they feel about their gayness and it is compelling to see them looking to us in the Western World and they are drawn to the Light of our pride and self-acceptance. They, too, can benefit from knowing about the history and development of pride in our Community. Maybe they can’t embrace it yet in their own countries and this can also be true in the USA in the Midwest and the South and in small towns and even in some big cities depending on the cultural background of the family.

The point is that this history must be explained to everyone in all cultures so that we can continue to grow and to function fully in society. The first step is to accept ourselves as worthy. We must never let a narrow-minded person judge us or shame us. Knowing what we know now, we can never again be shamed out of our PRIDE!